The Scourge of Rural Rage

by Robert Ringer

The latest invention from endlessly creative Democrats is “rural rage,” which they see as the cause of all of America’s problems.  Let’s face it, rural folks are downright dangerous.  They not only own pickup trucks and American flags, they also have guns.  Lots of guns.  And, above all, they’re angry.  Very angry.

While on a recent day pass from his nursing home, long-irrelevant Chris Matthews explained that the uneducated masses are angry at the liberal establishment and coastal elites, and for civilized people (like him) to push back against them is akin to fighting terrorism.  He stopped short of saying that they’re as dangerous as parents at school board meetings or people who pray outside of Planned Parenthood offices, but he implied as much.  Rural rage is scary stuff.

There’s only one problem with this latest Democrat narrative:  It’s not just rural folks who are angry.  Today, everyone is angry.  So angry that 78 percent of voters believe the country is headed in the wrong direction, and an overwhelming majority believe the economy is going to get worse.  We’re living in an age of chaos — pampered criminals running wild in our streets, a full-scale invasion at our southern border, education scores at a 30-year low, an economy on the verge of a depression, and crazy, incompetent people setting the entire world on fire.

If you follow Chris Matthews’ logic, it must mean that tens of millions of people in places like New York, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Chicago are afflicted with rural rage, because they’re just as angry as people in Appalachia.  You wouldn’t think it’s possible for folks who have no connection to rural America to be overcome with rural rage, but I guess that’s what happens when you don’t keep current on your vaccinations.

Then there are the foreign invaders who are bringing us goodies like leprosy, polio, tuberculosis, and measles, all of which health officials thought they had conquered years ago.  But rural rage is the worst disease of all, because no cure is in sight for this most insidious of all medical conditions.  Worse, every time the Supreme Court hands down a decision based the actual law of the land, the number of reported cases increases.

Even Democrats are angry, but for different reasons.  They’re angry because more than half the U.S. population refuses to let them have uncontested power.  They’re also angry because a dumb, outdated legal document known as the Constitution of the United States prevents them from taking totalitarian control of everyone’s life.  Above all, they’re angry because millions of voters seem determined to elect the reincarnation of Adolf Hitler to the office of the presidency.

Democrats are so angry, in fact, that they are increasingly saying things out loud that they heretofore have talked about only in the privacy of their mansions in Chappaquiddick and Martha’s Vineyard.  While Hillary’s “basket of deplorables” comment was a forerunner of things to come, more recently she lamented the challenge of reprogramming MAGA extremists, presumably so they would think more like responsible Democrats.  These are the kinds of ostensibly well-intentioned comments that bring about rural rage, because working people aren’t smart enough to realize that Democrats are simply trying to help them.

Nevertheless, in a spirit of goodwill, Democrats are going above and beyond the call of duty by working to remove Donald Trump from ballots in as many states as possible, because they realize that the unwashed masses are incapable of understanding that he’s their mortal enemy.  Sadly, instead of showing gratitude, the Democrats’ well-meaning gesture has inspired even more rural rage.

Not to be deterred, Democrats of late have been coming up with a plethora of new ideas aimed at improving the lives of those afflicted with rural rage.  Two current examples include forcing major retailers in California to display a “reasonable selection” of gender-neutral toys in their stores and a proposed a new bill that would force Chick-fil-A and other restaurants at rest stops along Interstate 90 in New York state to stay open on Sundays.  What’s to get angry about?

Clearly, the only cure for rural rage is population replacement.  Why argue with rural-rage dummies when you can just replace them?  By the end of the current presidential term, 15 million or so poor, uneducated, unskilled foreigners will have entered the country illegally.  Granted, some Republicans, who didn’t have the courage or determination to stop this criminal activity, will fight tooth and nail to keep them from voting, but the Democrats’ plan is much more sinister than that.

What I’m talking about is the biggest scam ever perpetrated against American citizens — “anchor babies.”  Even if the current batch of illegals are prevented from voting, their babies born in the U.S. will vote someday, and Democrats will constantly remind them who made that possible.  Comprende?

No one ever said dealing with evil is easy.

Copyright © 2020 Robert Ringer

ROBERT RINGER is a New York Times #1 bestselling author who has appeared on numerous national radio and television shows, including The Tonight Show, Today, The Dennis Miller Show, Good Morning America, ABC Nightline, The Charlie Rose Show, as well as Fox News and Fox Business. To sign up for a free subscription to his mind-expanding daily insights, visit www.robertringer.com.